9.24.2008

UPDATED franco dickcionario biodesagradable

John McCain In the Republican Party, there are two kinds of dicks: those that support the Iraq War but were too cowardly to fight in a war when they had the chance, and, much less common, those that support the Iraq War and did fight in other wars when they had the chance. McCain is the latter kind of dick.

Sarah Palin is the current governor of Alaska, Republican vice presidential candidate, a compulsive breeder, and a major lady dick. The only thing Sarah Palin seems to enjoy more than having children is giving those children ridiculous names and inadequate sex education. On August 29, 2008, Republican presidential candidate Senator John McCain performed perhaps the greatest political mindfuck in American history by announcing that he had chosen Sarah Palin as his running mate. Palin celebrated by ovulating.

Cindy McCain She hails from Phoenix, Arizona, a city pretty much entirely inhabited by the type of dick who likes to siphon off hundreds of billions of gallons of water from the Colorado River just to be able to play golf in the desert, in a state pretty much entirely inhabited by the type of dick who likes to vote “NO” on recognizing Martin Luther King Day as a national holiday.

Barack Obama is a senator, presidential candidate, and celebrity politician (“celebritician”), and a dick. It is important to note that Obama is not so much a dick by virtue of who he is, but rather by what he has chosen to involve himself in (e.g. presidential politics) and the resulting crowd it forces him to deal with (e.g. Joe Biden). ... As far as anyone can tell, however, the only things Obama did as junior senator from Illinois were to not vote for the Iraq War and run for president.

Joe Biden is the senior U.S. senator from Delaware, the 2008 Democratic vice presidential nominee, an obvious recipient of both hair plugs and dentures, and a dick. Biden failed to gain the Democratic Party’s nomination in 1988, when it came out that he was a serial plagiarizer. Biden’s two sons are lawyers. One, Beau, currently serves as the dick Attorney General—or, “Attorney Genital”—of Delaware. Interestingly enough, should Joe Biden win the Vice Presidency, many believe Beau Biden will be appointed to fill his Senate seat. The situation is complicated, however, as Beau is also a captain in the Army National Guard, and slated for deployment to Iraq in October 2008. Should this actually wind up being the case, it is sure to generate a ton of national media attention, especially because nepotism and military service in Iraq are supposed to be the sole provenance of the Republicans.

Michelle Obama Like many dicks, Michelle Obama is a lawyer. Like many lawyers, Michelle Obama is a dick. This is a perfect example of the converse logical property of dicktitudinousness.


...fun wikidicks definitions from Dickipedia.org